Letting Go….

Today is my “bestfriends” birthday. I spent the last two days well… three now is horrible pain from my back for no given reason that I know of. Today she called me, and I felt bad cause normally I stay up till Midnight and text her happy birthday before anyone else even has the chance too. Though, last night I was in a medical coma pretty much with the meds that the doctor gave me for my back. So when she calls me today I tell her that I’m at work, but we’ll figure something else out later. Not even 10 minutes later I decided to play hooky at work to be able to hang out with her.

Called her back up to find out that she isn’t too far away, and told her that I would meet her at the house and that Nick would let her in. Okay she’s on the way… I get home and she isn’t here yet okay must be traffic… wait 30 minutes and get a text saying that her daughter is crying and she needs to put her down for a nap so I tell her okay. Not even 5 minutes later I get a text saying that maybe I was right and we shouldn’t be friends anymore…

Okay wtf? So I message her back, and get a I wanted a girls day not a you and nick day. Your with him now and we’ll never be the way we “used to be” referring to highschool…. okay all you had to do was ask for a girls day??? [Also of course I’m not the person I used to be in highschool neither is she. As we grow and mature we change it’s all a part of life.] She continues on saying she’s tired of lying to her husband “who hates Nick” and blah blah blah…. Alright don’t lie to him? I have never told her to tie to anyone just do want she wants.

For a while Nick was her disciplinarian no sexual contact occurred, and she requested this of him. I found out a while back that she is extremely attracted to Nick, and she absolutely hates herself for it. You have to understand that she is like your average super model blonde so she is beyond gorgeous, and has a certain taste in men. Nick doesn’t fall into any of her categories at all. So to be attracted to him is like another world for her… I don’t care if she’s attracted to him…

So in the message she goes on about how she feels like she is cheating on her husband with him. Okay? I’m sorry you asked him to spank you, and punish you. He never asked and made sure the entire time that she was comfortable about it. Though apparently she felt like “I” was pushing her to this.

So her last message was that she doesn’t want to be friends anymore, and that she doesn’t know what has changed me so much. I used to be a nice person and fun to hang around. So I decided to respond in short with “okay”

I have changed a lot. I have let go of a lot of things. I don’t let people cause drama in my life anymore. I don’t want negative people in my life any more. I am who I am and no one gets to tell me who I should be or how I should act any more. I am my Master’s slave, but even he doesn’t try to change me as a person just guide me to be a better person.

~ by Raidyn on May 9, 2012.