Tomorrow beings a new era

Is the start of something that I have spent many night worrying about. When I lost my twins almost 5 years ago due to a possible weak cervix my body was wrecked with a fever and infection. The six months that followed that I was given deprovera which is a birth control shot which has a good chance to render you infertile. So that is 3 things that could have made me infertile.

Next, would be the fact that I didn’t get pregnant for the following 2 1/2 or so years. Which part of me believes was a gift from God, because if I got pregnant I would still be with John and not Nick. Though, another part of me worries that I may be broken. Well tomorrow I’m seeing a specialist just to find out “IF” I can get pregnant.

When everything happened originally medicare didn’t cover going to a specialist to see if I was okay. Then, when I was under John’s insurance which occurred after we had separated he wouldn’t allow me to go to the specialist, and they required his permission. So now that I’m divorced and I’m under Dad’s insurance I can finally go and put my nightmares at rest… hopefully. If they are true then I’m prepared to face that reality. Though… I still have to know.


~ by Snow on July 9, 2012.

2 Responses to “Tomorrow beings a new era”

  1. My positive thoughts are with you sweetie. I’m not sure if I ever want any more children – and a big part of that is because I too, am not sure I can even get pregnant any more and I don’t want to go through the heartache of trying one day and finding out that I can’t. I wish you the best today. *hugs*

    • Thank you so far so good. The Dr. doesn’t think that there should be any issues with me getting pregnant. So I am hoping to start “trying” around April of 2013

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